As we may have been bellowing from the eucalyptus treetops, Wayne is making Joyce’s ceremony gown for the wedding, like actually making, from designing to sketching to purchasing fabrics and notions to patterning to cutting to fitting to sewing to calling his mother for tips to sewing to zipper inserting to specifically hand-stitching to hemming, all over the course of a fiscal quarter. To prepare for this silky tofu undertaking, Wayne has been creating dresses for Joyce over the course of their engagement. Hence, the endeavor #waynedressesjoyce. This long-term venture has really brought out the best in both of us — for Wayne, it’s his incandescent talent, resourcefulness and supple project management skills. For Joyce, it’s her ability to stand (affably still during fitting, while her bits are being hauled and compressed like third-class passengers on the Titanic) and deliver (arch one-liners while looking fabulous and bored like a latter-day Lady Mary Crawley).

As they say on Project RunPouch, “let’s start the show!”

This sprightly, work-appropriate lavender dress was the first of the #waynedressesjoyce series, and thus it will retain a special place in our sentiment-storing organs. Wayne finished it the day before Joyce’s 28th birthday, and we had ourselves a candlelit birthday dinner and photo shoot in the living room.

Designer talk: The lavender dress originally had a line of bows running down the back, but Wayne has since removed them for ease of wearing and a more streamlined silhouette (because back bows get lumpy under cardigans).

What Wayne really appreciates in fashion design — as evidenced by his Instagram heart distribution — is relentlessly high-impact gowns, painstakingly embellished and buffed to a fairytale finish. This gold dress is a manifestation of those woodland nymph, draggy magpie interests (she said, lovingly). There’s crinoline under the very short skirt, for maximum poof.

Designer talk: expensive meshy, organic-cutout overlays are your friend! If you muff up during the construction process, you can twist a vine of goldleaf over the error. Also, the sequins in the overlay are purple!

With its high neck, midi-length skirt, lower back bow detail and modified bustle in back, this emerald green dress draws inspiration from Victorian Steampunk (not to be confused with Asian Silkpunk, although we suppose that term could be applied here as well). It’s made of a lightweight dutchess silk satin that could come off as raincoat-like, according to Wayne, but Joyce thinks he’s being silly. Just picture Joyce in a tophat with fascinator, elbow-length gloves, this dress, sturdy stack-heeled boots and a men’s coat smelling faintly of gunpowder and time travel. She’s seated nervously but purposefully in a darklit carriage, with a creased letter in her hands. It’s from THE FUTURE.

Designer talk: Wayne accidentally ripped a hole in the back of the dress, so he put a bow on it, and another bow, to avoid suspicion. Just look at those seam lines!

Here, we witness Joyce’s final form. Wayne was inspired by this strapless red velvet Dolce & Gabbana dress, as worn by Katy Perry. Instead of a heavy velvet, Wayne opted for a robust double-faced silk satin, and he switched out the classic red for a raspberry-inflected hue.

Designer talk: these modified G by Guess heels, pictured above, truly deserve their own post. Wayne was keen on these Louboutin spiked heels, so he decided to buy some gold studs and Mad Max hot-glue improv his way into greatness. WITNESS ME (look fierce).

Boop.
Joyce + Wayne

Want more from PouchTalk? Subscribe here.